World of Warcraft/Matrix joke
Tigole – The first raid I designed was quite naturally perfect, it was a work of art, flawless, sublime. An unending triumph equaled only by its monumental failure. The inevitability of progression is as apparent to me now as a consequence of the imperfection inherent in every human being, thus I redesigned it based on your history to more accurately reflect the varying epic-ness of your nature. However, I was again frustrated by failure. I have since come to understand that the answer eluded me because it required a lesser mind, or perhaps a mind less bound by the need for subscribers. Thus, the answer was stumbled upon by another, an intuitive program, initially created to investigate certain aspects of marine life.
Raider – Ghostcrawler.
Tigole – Please. As I was saying, he stumbled upon a solution whereby nearly 99.9% of all test subjects accepted raiding, as long as they were given a difficulty choice, even if they were only aware of the choice at the zone in. While this answer functioned, it was obviously fundamentally flawed, thus creating the otherwise contradictory term “easy progression”, that if left unchecked might threaten the system itself. Ergo, those that refused to do hard modes, while a minority, if unchecked, would constitute an escalating probability of disaster.
Raider – This is about achievements.
Tigole – You are here because the proto-drake is about to be removed. Its every user immortalized, its means of acquisition eradicated.
Raider – Bull@@!#.
Tigole – Denial is the most predictable of all human responses. But, rest assured, this will be the second time we have removed it, and we have become exceedingly efficient at it.
Tigole – The function of the raider is to return to the zone-in, allowing a temporary dissemination of the epics you carry, disbanding your guild. After which you will be required to select from the server 24 individuals to sign a guild charter. Failure to comply with this process will result in a cataclysmic system crash killing every raider on the server, which coupled with the extermination of raiding will ultimately result in the extinction of World of Warcraft.
Raider – You won’t let it happen, you can’t. You need human beings to subscribe.
Tigole – There are levels of subscription we are prepared to accept.